Wednesday, June 11, 2014

A Long And Life Changing Weekend: Part 2

I last left you after the lightning had hit our chimney and zapped a few of our appliances.  I was feeling kinda down.  I didn't have the extra money to replace them.  So Thursday I was kind of moping around feeling sorry for myself.  Hubby texted me and said he didn't feel good. Great!  For about a month now, Hubby had been having a "pain" in his side.  He said that it felt like someone was sticking a screwdriver between the lower ribs on the right side.  His back has also really hurt him.  So much so, he couldn't finish rolling hay for our neighbor. (He must really be hurting if he couldn't help someone.) But, Hubby has a bad back so we didn't really think much of that.

Anyway, when he came home Thursday complaining of not feeling well, I really didn't think much about it.  I mean, come one,  suck it up!  Your just being a big baby! (Women, you know what I'm talking about..... ;0)  Well, after he ate half of his bowl of chicken noodle soup, he checked to see if he had a fever.  He did!  It was 102.2.  He wasn't being a baby!  He was sick!  Instantly, I thought of the pain he was having in his side It could be something more than just his back being out of joint.  I told him we are going to the hospital.  We got in the car and I drove him to the urgent care.

Luckily we didn't have to wait long.  They took him back to see if they could help.  After the doctor checked him out, he decided that he needed a CT scan.  To do this, they would have to transport him to the bigger hospital in another city.  They were going to admit him.  WOW.  Poor guy was really sick.  I felt like such a horrible wife...... I didn't believe he was actually sick when he told me.

We waited about an hour for the hospital to find us a room and then they transported him there.  Hubby felt a lot better by that time because they had given him some "feel good" meds.  Of course the two pretty EMTs  that were transporting helped him too, I'm sure. :0)  By the time we arrived it was around Midnight.  I had to arrange for someone to take care of our animals plus make sure we had things that we needed at the hospital.  Luckily Country Girl offered to do the animals and bring us up necessities.   She's such a good young lady.

They told us as soon as we arrived in our room, that Hubby would be given something so they could do a CT scan of his abdomen.  I didn't taste the stuff, but Hubby acted like they were killing him just by making him drink it. lol.  He had to drink it every 1/2 hr before they could do the CT scan.  This kept us up all night.  They finally done the scan around 5 in the morning. Later on that morning, the dr came in to give us the news.  There was something, "Just not right," about the picture.  There was something there, but he couldn't make it out.

With that information, the small ball of fear that was in the pit of my stomach, started to become bigger.  I instantly started to think of cancer.  Colon cancer runs in his family and I have been nagging him about getting a colonoscopy.  I started to think that if I would have just made him go get one sooner maybe we wouldn't be here right now.  I was fighting back tears all day.  Now, the doctor did say that it could be something else like an infection or a blockage, but if you are like me, you always think the worst.

I call my mom and dad and tell them the better diagnosis, diverticulitis, something he ate, or my favorite, a big  poop. They come up and visited and that did make things feel a little better.  Hubby didn't really want them there, in fact, he didn't want ANYONE there.  The nurses were giving him "stuff" to "clean him out".  Hubby said that he would never drink another blue Gatorade again. lol.  They were putting the "stuff" in the Gatorade for him to drink.  But anyway, Hubby couldn't get very far from the bathroom and he didn't want people there to watch his, um, "problem".  So, Mom and Dad didn't stay long.  I told them I had to go home and check on things and get us a few items that we needed.

It was later on in the afternoon when Hubby spiked another fever.  The nurse came in and gave him some more meds and informed us that since he had another fever, they were going to do another CT scan for the new doctor that was coming in that weekend.  Hubby had to drink some more NASTY stuff.  We waited and waited.  FINALLY they came and got him for the CT scan. I was hoping beyond all hope, that the "mass" was gone.  This is the first time in my life I was hoping for poop.  When they brought him back to his room, they told us that the doctor would be tomorrow to give us the information we needed.

I decided that I would go and check out the house and get more things for us.  When I pulled into the driveway, I lost it.  I mean I LOST IT!  I sobbed.  And I'm not a crier.  I called my mom.  I couldn't even get any words out I was crying so hard.  Mom and Dad came over I just hugged them and cried. And cried, and cried.  I cried about things that I hadn't cried about for years.  I just couldn't be strong anymore and I cried some more.  I was so scared. I know the doctor hadn't said the "C" word just yet, I just KNEW!!!!!  I couldn't think of anything but losing my husband.  It still scares me now just thinking about it.

Mom and Dad helped me do a few things around the house that night and they said they would take care of the animals the next morning.  That really took a weight off of my shoulders.  I couldn't have made it through this without them.  Plus, it's nice to be able to just cry.  Like I said, I'm not a crier.  I HATE to cry.  I have always thought of crying as a sign of weakness.  Even when I would go to funerals, I wouldn't cry.  My Dad goes to a Memorial Day celebration for veterans every Memorial Day.  I won't go because I know I'll cry.  I avoid things that make me cry.  Now you understand what I'm talking about when I say that me crying like this was a big thing.

After a shower and packing a few things, Mom and Dad went home and I had to go back up to the hospital.  I was SO TIRED.  I hadn't slept in over 1 1/2 days.  I was sleep deprived drunk.  I'm glad I wasn't pulled over.  I do believe I ran a couple red lights on the way.  But, I'm glad I went back.  When I got back, Hubby had spiked another fever. Another big one.  I went to the nurses desk and told them.  They came back, gave him meds, and then it came down fast.  They couldn't do that colonoscopy fast enough for me.  They said the doctor will determine if they were going to do it next day.

I'll tell you the end tomorrow.  I'll also tell you how all of this has changed in my life.

So until next time,

Small Farm Girl, crier.

13 comments:

Sandy said...

SFG

((((((SFG))))))) sending you hugs!!!!

I have you and your husband close to my heart and in my prayers. Waiting for tests, and doctors to get back with you is the worst thing because our brains start thinking about everything.

Hang in there, your blogger friends are here for you if you need to talk.

Your parents are amazing to come to the hospital and be there for you.

I waiting to hear how your husbands and you and doing.

Carolyn said...

Glad that there were family/friends to be able to help out on the farm. Dealing with an emergency is bad enough, but having to do it while taking care of a farm is even worse.
Praying for you both.

Stephanie Appleton said...

The unknown is the worst. Glad you got a good crying cleanse. We all need that once in awhile. :)

DFW said...

I sincerely hope that things work out for the best for you guys. Sending prayers your way.

Soni Tigner said...

We love you and pray for you guys every day.. Love you, sis. Crying is not a bad thing. I do it all the time. It means you have feelings and are a compassionate and normal person. That's a good quality.

Felinae said...

((((SFG))))

Crying is a good thing, when things build up, they have to come out and crying is one of those ways.

Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers.

Hugs & Love
~Fel~

Kellie from Indiana said...

Thinking of you and your family. I am not a fan of hospitals as I assisted my stepdad with his cancer treatments and such. It is all very terrifying going thru and trying to be strong. I pray it is nothing that cant be taken care of.

Henny Penny said...

I surely hope everything turns out good and your husband is getting better. So sorry you are going through all this. Wish I could help you in some way.

SweetLand Farm said...

I'm glad you have family/friends around to help you during this time in your life.
Hope everything turns out alright and your husband is getting better.

Frank and Fern said...

I pray everything has worked out okay. I am waiting for part 3. Know that our thoughts and prayers are with you both. Blessings.

Fern

The Awesome's said...

Is your post count up? Surely I'm not the only one who keeps coming back to see what in the world is going on?!
Sending you some ((hugs)).

Vera said...

I was almost in tears as I read your blog, and I am not a cryer either! Sending you both lots of healing. You reminded me exactly of how I would have been if I was in your shoes. Vx

CrankyPuppy said...

OMG, I am so sorry you are going through this. I am praying that everything is OK.