March 13 was my 38 birthday. 38 is not a significant number. It doesn't have a 5 or a 0 after it. But, this birthday has got me to thinking. If I live to see 80,(if) my life is almost half-way over. Now, I'm not one to worry about getting old, or having wrinkles, or lossing my young girlish figure,(...hahahahahahahaha, breath,breath, hahahahahahahahaha, gasp, gasp, hahahahahaha, Ok, sorry, I couldn't help myself.) I started to look and see if I wanted to live the second half of my life, like I lived my first half. The answer.....no! I don't want my second half to be like the first.
I looked back at the first part of my life. What kind of life did I live? First off, I didn't really appreciate my life. I thought that it would always be there. I started to procrastinate. Things I wanted to do or needed to do, I would just do tomorrow. Well, tomorrows are limited.
Another thing that I would do was just excist. I didn't direct my life. I just let things happen. Now, I know you can only do what you can do. But, I wasn't even doing what I could do. I was just being. I had no drive. I look back at all the things that COULD have been done.
Now, I'm not living with regrets here. I realize I was blessed with many things in my life. What I am saying is, I am done procrastinating with my life. I'm going to LIVE my life. I'm not taking a trip to Paris, or going sky diving, but what I am going to do is the things I keep "putting off". Like, lose this weight to where I can move better. Forget the looking better. I don't care about that. I just want to get healthy. You never know when I might need to be physical. I couldn't do anything physical right now.
I want to really get into this homesteading. I have found a passion. I have found something that will actually "drive" me. It is something that I can learn new things every day with. I have to stop "putting off" doing it. Get the seeds sown. Get the goat barn built. Start fixing fence. There are so many things that I want to do with our farm. If I keep doing all the things that need to be done, my weight wont be a problem much longer. lol.
I hope you don't get the feeling like I'm going through a mid-life crisses. Well, maybe I am. But, it's a get my butt in gear, mid-life crises. One other thing that I want to do is blog more. I really enjoy having the "family" of bloggers out there. You guys help keep me motivated! I'm really looking forward to the next part of my life! Bring it on!!!!!!
So until next time,
Small Farm Girl, revamped!