Friday, March 21, 2014

A Sad Day

I sold all of my goats.  I have mixed feelings about it.  When the man who bought them left, I actually cried, and I'm not a crier.  I can't hardly describe my feelings.  It's like I broke up a long relationship with a boyfriend who I know wasn't good for me.  It makes it worse because this is like a "first love" relationship.  The goats were my "first love" when it come to farm animals. (My horses don't count.)  It feels weird when I think about them.  When I go outside I don't hear them yell at me for food.  I missed it badly the first few times I went outside.  I assume I will get use to the quiet. I have to move forward though.  I have to make sure I am ready for whatever is in my future.

 So, Hubby and I, and hopefully a few others, are going to build a barn.(Somehow)  It's what was needed before I actually bought my animals.  The barn that you see in my header is full of hay and farm equipment and it doesn't have room for animals.  Plus, it is pretty far from the house if I had to go and check up on animals in the middle of the night.  I think Hubby felt sorry for me when I cried.  It probably shocked him too.  Like I said, I don't cry.  He has been really pushing the whole "barn" thing since the goats left.  I told him that if I had a place for them, I wouldn't have sold them. But, I know that a barn is so expensive to build and we don't have the money to build one.  But like I said, Hubby is really pushing for us to build one.

 When I had my goats, I felt like I was letting them down.  I didn't have the means of taking care of them the way that I felt like they should be taken care of. I had goat huts that they could get in out of the rain. But when it comes to milking, Hanna and I would be outside.  Sometimes even in the pouring rain.   It was something that just had to be done.  Hopefully if there is someway we can get a barn, I will be able to go forward in my journey of homesteading.   I don't know, maybe sheep?  Maybe alpacas?  Maybe more goats?  I'm not sure.  I do know that with a barn I will be able to take care of whatever we decide, a lot better.  Maybe, just maybe, I won't have this horrible feeling anymore.

I want people to see that just because you have land, it doesn't mean that you have a place for animals.  There is so much more.

Ok, I'm done with this "down" post.  I promise there will be a happier one coming soon.

So until next time,

Small Farm Girl,  feeling a little down.

13 comments:

Lamb said...

Yesterday I sold 3 of my goats. Gabby gave me little goat kisses after she was loaded on the truck and I totally lost it.
We could take care of them, but we needed the money and we are down-sizing in anticipation of our move. It hurts.
You do what you have to do and carry on.

small farm girl said...

Thank you Lamb. We both will have to carry on. :-)

Sandy said...

SFG,

Animals are like kids to us. We get attached, and it's so hard to let them go. Sending a hug to you ((((SFG)))), this pain your feeling will pass.

small farm girl said...

I know Sandy. It was for the best. I'll be fine. See? :-D

Carolyn said...

I'm sorry to hear about your goats. We jumped into the animal thing with just a small shed, then a slightly larger shed and not adequate fenced area. And we're fighting the space issue and the need for a barn. I know you read EVERYWHERE about having the facilities FIRST, but I guess we just didn't listen.

I'm sure you guys will scrounge & scrimp & use what materials you can get your paws on to build a barn. If you build it, they (animals!!) will come :)

Carolyn said...

I'm sorry to hear about your goats. We jumped into the animal thing with just a small shed, then a slightly larger shed and not adequate fenced area. And we're fighting the space issue and the need for a barn. I know you read EVERYWHERE about having the facilities FIRST, but I guess we just didn't listen.

I'm sure you guys will scrounge & scrimp & use what materials you can get your paws on to build a barn. If you build it, they (animals!!) will come :)

Anonymous said...

Reading your post made me remember when we gave our mini donkeys away. I loved those animals, but it was just too much to care for them anymore. It was way better for us to let them go than it was for them. I pray they are at a good ranch now.

Katherine Grossman said...

I'm so sorry you learned an important homesteading lesson the hard way. Build the best shelter you can afford and simply start again. There will probably still be time enough in the future for goats, sheep, pigs or whatever.

small farm girl said...

Yes Carolyn we will have to skimp and save, but some how , some way, I have GOT to get a barn.

small farm girl said...

In my mind I'm seeing my goats at a nice big farm. Although I'm not real sure. Most of the time I try not to think about it.

small farm girl said...

Thank you Katherine. In my mind I see a wonderful barn filled with many animals in our future. :-)

Vera said...

Oh this must have been a sad experience for you. Hope you get your barn soon. We urgently need a barn but the place where we were going to build one has been seriously flooded for the last two years so we will have to make do with much smaller garage sized units. The infrastructure of a homestead / small farm takes a lot of money, as you and I are finding out!

Fiona said...

Hello there, I just saw the simplest small barn, my husband drives past a small farm on the way to work. They had a car port out in the goat field. open sided. The other day it was all closed in and Ralph stopped to see what had happened. They had turned it in to a very neat Small bar for goats. One side had pens [4] and the other side was open with with milking stand and feed storage. Ralph took me to see it and we had a good visit with the people who have it. They got the car port at an Estate sale for $250.00.